Cataerobics

[Originally posted 4/15/09] I had this delightful fantasy the other day that I could help my cat lose weight by getting some of his toys together and letting him swat away at them while I played Rocky music in the background. (Yes, I have the soundtracks of Rocky I, II and IV on cd.) We were going to start with the training montage from Rocky IV, then move on to Eye of the Tiger, then on to Gonna Fly Now, and maybe finish with Redemption. It was going to be hilarious and wonderfully cathartic. Uh, and beneficial for my cat, too.

Tommy is basically a live, non-talking version of Garfield. He's huge, orange, and embarrassingly lazy. And possibly even nearsighted -- I've seen bugs crawl right past him, and he won't even acknowledge their existence (when he's supposed to be exterminating them!). Tessie, my petite, extroverted girl cat, is more of a real, live Nermal -- extremely cute, athletic, and not really in need of a feline weight-loss program.

But that's not the case with Tommy. Maybe he's just a cat after my own heart. I've noticed that anytime I moved back home with my parents (summers during college, etc.), I'd gain about 15-20 pounds from inactivity. But Tommy also put on some weight this last time I lived with Mom and Dad. (I think my mom felt sorry for my babies while I was at work and just kept refilling their food bowls.) When I took him for his annual checkup one year, the vet put him on a strict diet, and I think he had to lose about 2 pounds. (He probably weighed around 17 pounds at the time. Tessie only weighed about 7.)

So, it was this 2-month ordeal of me feeding Tommy this special canned food twice a day, keeping it away from Tessie, and getting up early to start the daily routine. Tommy enjoyed the food, so getting him to eat it wasn't any problem. But he went through about 2 cases of that stuff that I had to buy specifically from the vet's office. And if I fed the cats dry food, I followed the vet's advice and cut a hole in an empty liter-water bottle to create a sort of rolling food bowl. (It's supposed to be exercise for cats if they reach their paws into a bowl to scoop the food out.) Anyway, after all that -- and I was totally sure that Tommy was, in fact, losing weight -- the vet called and said he had GAINED half a pound! What the heck?? It was kinda like one of those weigh-ins on The Biggest Loser where the contestant is like, "I don't know, I gave it my all," and the trainer has their head in their hands and is doing their darnedest to hold in the world's biggest groan.

I took Tommy immediately off the diet and, a couple of months later, moved out of my parents' house. :) He did drop a noticeable amount of weight after I moved into a roomy apartment and he started strutting around like he owned the place. (And I shed a lot of my extra fluff, too.)

But somehow, he seems to have gained part of it back. (Now I understand why my mom liked to make fun of him and say he looked pregnant!) I think maybe I've been too generous at mealtimes for some reason, or maybe he's been eating/stealing Tessie's portion when I'm not looking, or a little of both.

So, I'm cracking down again, watching the food bowls like a hawk to make sure Tommy doesn't scarf down too much, and I may even bust out the rolling food bowl again. Unfortunately, Cataerobics had very minimal success. (By that, I mean he just stared at me most of the time I was flicking his toys playfully at him.) I think he gets most of his exercise when he's wrestling with Tessie or jogging to his food bowl. But we have enjoyed some swatting matches lately (mano a paw-o). I might try more of that.

But I won't give up on my little Garfield. His next weigh-in is next month, and we can do this! It's the eye of the tiger! It's the thrill of the fight!