A telling story?

I've heard that a child's personality is set by the time he or she is 5 years old. I think this explains a lot. Instead of saving this for Throwback Thursday, I would like to share a blast from the past with you now. Thank you in advance for reading.

On September 8, 1981, an extremely awesome relative gave me a book that had blank pages in it. Perhaps to celebrate the occasion, I wrote a story for my new book. I was 5 years old, and I think I was a creative storyteller at that age. But I wasn't old enough yet to sit at a typewriter (which we had back then instead of laptops) and type out a coherent story on my own. So, in my book that had blank pages, I drew the pictures (and I drew even more pictures later), and I dictated the text to 4 different adults over several days' time. What you are about to read is this story which I created when I was 5 years old, and which I will retype here verbatim 32.5 years later. I will also include all applicable artwork. I think you will find the story to be hilarious yet sad. In fact, I might share it with my therapist later.

JIMMY AND JULIE

By TIRZAH. T.

Once upon a time a time there was a boy named Jimmy and a girl named Julie. Jimmy was nine years old and wore a T-shirt with a number 9. Julie was three years old so she wore a T-shirt with a number 3. They lived with their parents in a white house.

They would always play football together - on tuesdays.

One day Julie made a touchdown but messed up the vegetable garden. So -- their parents asked them to go to the forest to live -- and stay there. After they left, the parents fixed the garden and it was perfect.

In the forest the "kids" found beautiful flowers and some wood and tools and some paint and brushes, too. So they built a house and lived there.

When the kids were in the forest they painted a house. So they decided to live in the forest all the time. Next day they were searching for food, so they went to a store and bought lots of food and had lunch. Then they went back to the house. Soon they took a nap.

This is a story about about Jimmy and Julie. When Jimmy and Julie went to the eating store they ate carrots and delicious meat, and the man gave them some delicious milk. Jimmy ate some tomatoes and Julie ate some green beans, and the food was delicious. They went to their old wooden house in the forest where their mother and father lived all by themselves. No, the mother and the father lived in the town and the kids lived in the forest! -- where they played football, and Jimmy made a toutchdown.

The next day they went to the grocery store and got some more food. The man opened the food store at 7:30 in the morning, and the kids went at 8:00 o'clock. The kids went to the store and the boy had the money and they waited and waited. Later, when they went to play, they played and played. And, when they went to the house, their food was ready. They lived in the forest for a long time. On the next day they took the food store man some flowers.

So when Jimmy and Julie went back home to live, when they opened the door the mother and father were still there. Their parents noticed the children still had the football and they were very sad. So, the little boy and the girl went back to the forest.

When they got back to the forest, Jimmy and Julie found more beautiful flowers. But they had to live there, because when Julie made a touchdown, she messed the vegetable garden all up.

The next day the parents decided to get rid of the garden because they wanted the children to come back home because they missed them so much. So they hurried and hurried and got the number to call the kids.

So -- the kids went back home to live with their parents. And they were very happy but the next day it was their birthday. So they had a birthday party and all the grandparents and aunts and uncles were there and everybody was happy.

So the kids played football when Jimmy came home from school and there was no vegetable garden any more.

Yeah, that's right. In my opinion, this story was written by a little girl who was already messed up but didn't know it yet. Did anyone else notice the bald father, the anxious obsession with the consequences of committing a mistake, the senseless rejection, the abandonment, the orphanhood, and the budding hostility toward football and vegetables? (Also, I'm not sure why every retail establishment that showed up in my childhood artwork was named Pop Tomz. Hmm. Perhapz havingz a Z in my namez scarredz mez for lifez? Whatevz.)

I'm not sure I saw it then, and I'm pretty sure the adults in my life didn't see it then, either, but I was already hurting from my toxic home environment at age 5. Gosh. All the issues were already right there in black and white (and blue). I was the older of two daughters. The older sibling in my 5-year-old story was a boy. I am so glad that my heavenly Father has already been fixing my gender confusion issues. And yes, I don't think we had a garden when I was that age, but I don't doubt that a crummy garden would have been more important than me.

Take a deep breath, Tirzah. Breathe it out. Yeah, that's right. Vindication feels good. You've got a new Daddy now, and He's taking very good care of you. You're welcome to live in His house forever. You belong there. He won't kick you out of there. You're stuck there. And you like it.