Tuesday, June 10, 2014

Unemployment, part 6

This is a picture of Choochie's new supply of cat food that arrived in the mail today: 4 cans of wet food and one bag of dry food. It wouldn't otherwise be a big deal, except that this is the first time either of my cats have ever had food shipped to them (the event added quite a bit of excitement to our afternoon). Also, a few weeks ago, I randomly got an email from my vet's office explaining that they were going to mail us this supply of free food, for free. The last time I purchased a bag of this brand of Choochie's special thyroid food, it cost $48. Historically, Choochie has snubbed wet food, but perhaps I can try to change her mind. Meanwhile, she has definitely been wolfing down the dry food, which will probably last her a few more months. For free! Truly a big deal!

Yes, it's just cat food. But it's also a reminder that my God is a good Daddy who takes extraordinarily good care of me (and my cats). He always has, and He always will. That's a good thing, especially since money doesn't grow on trees. It never has, and it never will, especially during unemployment.

"Behold, the eye of the Lord is on those who fear Him, on those who hope in His mercy, to deliver their soul from death, and to keep them alive in famine." (Psalm 33:18-19)

"The Lord knows the days of the upright, and their inheritance shall be forever. They shall not be ashamed in the evil time, and in the days of famine they shall be satisfied." (Psalm 37:18-19)

I noticed recently that Psalm 33:19 and Psalm 37:19 are almost identical. I thought that was extremely cool. I'm not sure if both psalms were written by the same guy (I know that David wrote 37, but I'm not sure about 33). But I do know that the Holy Spirit inspired the Bible, so in that sense both psalms definitely have the same Author.

I've heard that sometimes God repeats Himself throughout scripture because the verses that He repeats are REALLY important to Him. I think to a degree that's true, and yet there are some major treasures hidden inside the Bible that are only mentioned once, and I don't think that makes those particular verses any less important. What I do know for sure is that I'm a kinesthetic learner. That means I learn by doing (as opposed to being a visual or audio learner). My learning style requires a tremendous amount of trial and error and repetition, and I must be allowed to ask questions during the learning process. Of course, God my Father knows all about this, so I don't think it's an accident that He repeated Himself in Psalm 33:19 and Psalm 37:19 and made sure that it caught my attention.

Since I'm a kinesthetic learner, you can give me all the audio-visual aids you want, but the information isn't going to mean anything to me until I roll up my sleeves and try it out myself. Of course, God my Father knows all about this, so I think this is one reason why He teaches me stuff by allowing me to go through trials. You can preach to me for hours about how God will keep me alive during a "famine" (e.g., unemployment), and I'll believe you, but it won't be etched permanently inside me unless I get to roll up my sleeves and try out this "famine" phenomenon myself.

(I'm 38 years old, so I've definitely been unemployed before, but this is the first time I've ever been unemployed while I was psychblogging. This is why you're getting an earful/eyeful. Thank you again for reading.)

I've been officially out of work for about 2 months now, so I've entered a somewhat more desperate stage in the unemployment process. I realize that 2 months is probably a very short amount of time for unemployment. But by "desperate," I mean that it's sort of gotten to the point where I'm almost starting to run out of ideas of where/how to look for work. This is definitely an awkward season. Do you remember me mentioning that I had a job interview several weeks ago? Long story short, that was a very unpleasant experience. I found out that a former coworker got hired instead of me. I'm glad she found work, especially since I didn't know that she had also been unemployed for a while. I'm sure she'll do a good job for them. But I hope they treat her well.

I think this stage in the unemployment process is a bit of a maverick one. Today while I was stuffing envelopes with my resume, I noticed that I had addressed one of them to a company that I had interviewed at years ago, twice, and twice they did not hire me. Eh, what the heck. I sent them an updated resume, anyway. I'm curious if they'll remember me. Heh. I can do this maverick thing, no problem.

What was strange was when I was double-checking addresses on Google and discovered that I had almost mailed my resume to companies that are based out of people's homes. There's nothing wrong with doing business in your house or apartment, of course... but I hope you understand how weird it would feel for me to mail my information to somebody's home, especially if the company is so small that it more than likely wouldn't want to hire anyone from the outside.

Weirdness was definitely a motif at my previous job, and weirdness has definitely seeped into my current job search. I remember weirdness. I'm thankful for the weirdness.

I wonder if Joseph in the Bible (in Genesis) was thankful for weirdness, too. One interesting thing about Joseph is that he had an extremely important government job during a nationwide famine. I wonder if he learned about storing and distributing food right before he got that job -- when he was stuck in a pit or in a prison. Hmm.

God is the Ruler of the Universe. He can do whatever He wants. He's in charge. He's the One who I've put in charge of my life. I honestly don't know exactly what the deal is with this particular season of unemployment, but God doesn't seem worried. Honestly, whenever I try to talk to Him about it lately, He's said, "Do you have a problem with waiting?" No, Sir, definitely not.

So, Choochie is set for her specialized cat food. (She recently got a good report from the vet, who confirmed that the special food is helping to bring Choochie's adorable little thyroid to where it needs to be.) Macho is set for his cat food. I am set for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. All is well here in Tirzah's home. There's also plenty of weirdness to go around for everybody, plenty of uncertainly looming overhead, and plenty of awkwardness to tiptoe around. But God has also carved out plenty of maverickness inside me that I hope will come in very handy in the near future.

Truly a big deal!

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